DID Sybil Crack A Joke? Tara Did!

•July 7, 2010 • 3 Comments

Sybil was introduced to us in 1973 on a non-fiction book with the same name.  It is about the treatment of a psychiatric patient with a Dissociative Identity Disorder formerly known as Multiple personality disorder.  Sybil has total of 16 personalities including her main personality.  Though considered that the case is a fraud, it has been used as a classic example of DID (Dissociative Identity Disorder) when I was on my undergrad school and probably also in some other University.

United States of Tara was introduced to us in 2009 with the lead character Tara.  Tara like Sybil is an American woman who has a Dissociative Identity Disorder.  Tara along with 3 other personality who was introduced to us in the first season is a wife, a sister, and a mother of 2.  T, a 16 year-old “trapped” in a body of an old woman who is wild and a huge flirt; Buck, a male, ex-vet from Vietnam and Alice a “Martha Stewart” housewife (Gimme was introduce later in the season).

The comedy series that shows a person with DID and a family that struggle to live with her is a refreshing and original idea that would entice you more to watch.  Toni Collette won an Emmy and a Golden Globe for the first season of the series and it is a well deserve win; if you would see even the first episode of the series you would know why.

With all the personality talk on this entry, would you consider yourself of having more than 1 personality in dealing daily lives?  Do you think that it helps you when you enter a character from another character in real life?  What is the dark side of your personality (I’m sure we all have at least one)?  What will be the name of your other “self”? What do you do to trance to your “other” personality?

The Chain Letter from the Evil Geek

•July 4, 2010 • 8 Comments

I can’t believe that Chain Letters still survive this day.  Well from real letters (esp. inside your locker) to my e-mail and now on the inbox of my facebook.  Seriously does anyone think something is going to happen if you didn’t send the message?  Do people actually read the letter?  Do they enjoy sending the letters and causing to flood my mail instead of the world turning upside down as the letter’s original plan?

Whoever start the “new” letter from hell, he/she must’ve been really bored.  I mean how can Satan write a letter now that there are so many checking-in in his magma hotel?  Some of them are really stupid because it does not have any content like:

“I receive this message and ignore it and blah blah blah blah I had a prune on my ass and my family died in an accident.”

Well what is the letter? I mean the person behind this is just explaining what happened when he was not able to send the letter; but there is no letter except for the explanation why you need to send the damn letter!

Anyways, I would make my own “Chain Letter” and start sending it to people, if you receive one you must send it or you know what will happen… nothing.

Here’s the evil letter:

Tam tam tam. Dum dum dum. Sundum dum dum…

That is an ancient spell from the geek kingdom of “Hualda”.

If you have read the spell you should start sending this to 6 guys, 6 girls and 6 gays

IF NOT, you will have blood in your stool for 3 days.  After the torrent of red fluid from your a-hole you would start coughing Justin Bieber’s hair and leeches will start crawling from your stomach to your left nipple!  You will not be able to sleep as you see the image of Rosie O’Donnell’s crotch inside a Krispy Kreme shop.  You will hear start hearing voices of a man named Miley Cyrus and he will tell you what will happen to you in hell.  You will be haunted by series of flash floods from the skin of a legendary demon, Whitney Houston.  You will be drag for miles and miles of bladed road and be thrown in a lake of lemon juice.  After inducing 666 times of heart attack by watching Catwoman and Gigli simultaneously and be revived for 665 times, you will end up in hell and spend eternity in the world of pain and bad movies.

Trust me, I did read it and ignore it… I had the blood in my stool for 2 days and send the message to my friends.  Unfortunately you need to send this individually in their mail and not tagging everyone… Imagine! Justin Bieber’s Hair!!!

Micro Mini Story 004… (It’s Free When It’s Three)

•July 1, 2010 • Leave a Comment

Claire is lying on her bed with Eric while watching MTV.  The channel is showing an Interview of Bob Dylan then Eric asked Claire “How much would you pay someone for a kiss?”  Claire stared at Eric and smiled at him.

“Why would I pay someone if I can have free kiss?”

“Really? From me? Well all my kisses is not really free babe, I am keeping track of all the kisses you gave to me” Eric squint his right eye.  It has been his mannerism to squint since he was about 6 years old but for some reason girls fall for it.

“Well how many uhm how many kisses I got from you already? Did you keep track of kisses you gave to me?”  Claire got on top of Eric while he put down his cigarette on the ash tray beside the mattress on the floor where they are lying. Eric grunt and think for about 10 seconds and Claire started brushing the side of his head with his both hands.

“Babe, you already kiss me 34 times since we met this afternoon.  I never kiss you, I only respond to your kisses which I never initiate.  I usu-“  Eric puff some smoke from his cigarette and continue speaking.  “I usually charge half a dollar per kiss, which would make it 17 bucks.”

Claire glare on Eric and asked him “So I can charge you any price I want?”  Eric replied with a yes and asks how much Claire would charge him.

“A hundred bucks, but it is free when it’s three.”  Eric smiled and gave Claire a kiss.  “That’s one, that is two and… this would be three.” Eric gave Claire’s most intense and passionate kiss she ever receives in her entire life.

The next day Claire woke up the next morning and saw a note on the side of her mattress saying “I can’t wait for the next batch of 3’s, Eric”

* * *

Thank you Dana Jean for the picture🙂

When Night Turns Afternoon (Dehydration)

•May 6, 2010 • Leave a Comment

For the past days weeks I’ve been disoriented on the day and night here in the Philippines.  The temperature in the Pi right now has been hitting more than the normal human temperature.  Yes! Above 37° Celsius or 98.6° Fahrenheit and this is not the worst part; the worst part is this is being experience 24 hours a day!  The temperature is not fluctuating; it is a stable deep fry to give us a permanent sauna bath with our own sweat.

No clouds to cover sun and a few wind to blow a very familiar warm air that gives us more shivering warmth.  This heat is not even advisable for sun bathing because it will give you skin cancer if you go directly to that sadistic sun rays for 30 minutes straight.  This is the time when after you step out from a bath, you would sweat after a few minutes.  This is the time when you would be thinking very evil and tapping the neighbor’s wire for free electricity to have a 24/7 AC system without paying the wicked bills.  This is the time when you would be wishing you never step out of that bathroom.  This is the time you would be murdering the person who compose the “rain rain go away song.”

One of the million downside of having an “eternal” heat is dehydration (duh!).  So, I made a list on how to avoid dehydration in this time of the year.

  • Drink gargantuan amount of fluid! NOT hypertonic fluid (huh? Google search!) This does not include drinking coffee, tea and cola because these are diuretics and can cause more dehydration.  So, stick with water, juices and sports drink.  Even if you do not feel thirsty, drink on schedule like every hour or whatever that suits you.  DON’T forget to bring a bottle of fluid every time you step out your house especially on long trip or going to the gym etc.
  • Wear light apparel!  This is not the time when you are allowed to wear a scarf around your neck.  In fact, you are not allowed to wear scarf in the Philippines whole year round.  Wear tanks, pekpek shorts, etc and use cotton so sweat can be easily be evaporated to avoid overheating.  Please use white or anything light, the sun is already painful to the skin please spare our eyes.
  • Take a lot of shower!  This would help you to not “overheat” and it will give you a fresh feeling.  Again the sun is damaging and we don’t need your damaging smell.  PS use deodorants or antiperspirants.  Baslik (basing kili-kili/wet under arms) is not a decent view.
  • Be smart and know the sign and symptoms of dehydration. (I wouldn’t put it here ‘cause I don’t want to hit my 500 limit words per post)
  • Read my blog! Or anything that isn’t extraneous.  Conserve your energy and if you are working out, again, drink enough fluid and rest in between.

Micro Mini Story 003… (Gloomy Thursday vol.2)

•May 4, 2010 • 2 Comments

A continuation of Gloomy Sunday vol.1… Click HERE for the Gloomy Thursday vol.1

Catherine is a 49 year old widow who just lost her son exactly a week ago.  Jake was everything to her especially after her husband died because of pancreatic cancer.  It was hard for her to see Jake leaving for college; now, he is gone in this world.

Catherine had the viewing of Jake at her home.  There were loads of people to see Jake for the last time before he is conceal 6 feet under.  One of them is Van, Jake’s friend.

“Mrs. Diaz, I’m sorry for the lost, Jake is a good man and a good friend.”

Catherine didn’t reply on Van and stare blankly on her cigarette lying on the ash tray.  Van takes a sip on his black coffee waiting for a reply of Catherine who seems to be really flat.  When Van is about to walk away from Catherine, Catherine start speaking; “He jump from your room right?” Catherine lean forward without looking for Jake and pick something on the carpet.

“I was on my class when he… we never lock our room from the dorm.”

Catherine stares sharply on Van “He didn’t deserve to die, he is my baby, he is such a sweet—” Catherine failed to finish her sentence and start to have tears on her eyes, but she is forcing it to not jump from her eyeballs.  “Jake told me that his girl friend is cheating on him for 2 months… I never see her or even know her name, she here somewhere?”

Van looked pale and seems to stop breathing; he failed to make a sound from his mouth and looks very awkward. “I… eh… ah… Mrs. Diaz… I… I think she was here earlier didn’t she send her condolence?”

“There have been many girls who approach me to send their condolences but none of them introduce as his girl friend, maybe they are afraid that I know why he killed himself.”  Catherine stood up and walks away from Van and head to her room holding her purse tightly.

***

Van went to Jake’s room and opened his window, there are no bars and he close his eyes.  He opened it shout “I’m sorry” and jump off.  It feels like he is falling 5 minutes, but in fact he hit the ground head first in a matter of seconds.  A loud Thud echoed into the dead silent streets of James.

People were around Van’s body, someone called an ambulance, he broke his neck and suddenly a gunshot was heard inside the house, inside Catherine’s room.

Misinterpreted Extravagance

•April 29, 2010 • 4 Comments

Have you ever been in Manila and wanted to eat somewhere or drink a cup of coffee, but you can’t seem to find any seat at all?  Well you have been a victim; victim of the people who cannot afford electricity or an internet connection at home.

A friend of mine Selya calls them “status symbol”; and they have swarmed the whole metro devouring all the free wifi they can get.  They are the new locust of society eating the free electricity with their 5 hour empty cup.  Do they feel special when someone gives them a glance while typing their new blog entry? Or better, while they plant new crops on Farmville?

Selya told me that they just wanted to be recognized or be misinterpreted as part of the high class society by hanging out in Starbucks or some other Western born food chain.  Can’t you be part of the high society and order a Jolly Hotdog or a halo-halo on the nearest block? If I am part of the “high class” I would be hanging out on my pool side or my indoor carpeted tennis court while drinking my Cristal.  I will be eating my breakfast over France, oh wait we have problem in our economy so I’ll be just eating over Mandarin Hotel and poop on the other side of the world.  Most of the things they cherish so much are so over-rated.

Most of the “status symbols” would say “ew” on street foods Filipino have been devouring for ages.  They are the people that would say they have never eaten a kwek-kwek (quail eggs on orange batter) or anything that is considered “low-class” food in their whole schizophrenic life.  They are the people who think Jollibee do not have anything edible and think it is soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo cheap.

Did people in Manila (not in general but they are not few) has delusion of grandiosity? What or who is to blame?

Telephone is a Rare Creature

•April 7, 2010 • 3 Comments

This article is not about Lady Gaga’s new single Telephone, but a real apparatus that transmit sound to a distant point.  This isn’t even about Mobile Phone; I am talking about real, old fashioned, home line.

Before I ask those entire questions that nobody answers, let us have a brief history of the telephone.  Since telephone has been widely debated on who invented it, I’m just gonna say that it was Alexander Graham Bell who first patent for an electric telephone.  Since that, it has been almost impossible to survive without a phone. In 1876, Tivadar Puskás a Hungarian engineer; invented a telephone switchboard that allows telephone exchanges.

Today however, our home number barely rings 3 times per day while my mobile phone can be use as a back massager with its nonstop vibration.  Did we already forget to our home number and decide to just call with a more pricey mobile number? Do we really enjoy texting? Should I stop giving away my mobile number and just give my home number instead?

As I wait beside our phone at home, my mobile has already received 3 text messages, 2 new comments on my facebook status, and a nobel prize for literature (thanks to Doyen) and the phone has not even budge a single decibel.  Then I realize, when was the last time I used a phone?  Have I evolved already on not using my home number and just sticking on my mobile?  When was the last time you used a telephone and not your mobile?  How many home number have do you still know without using your mobile phone’s phonebook?  Did our brain cells devolved in memorizing numbers?

***

Thanks to Danish Cortuna for finding this photo and a very special thanks to Krystine Lozano for making me use her photo; sorry I might have edited your pic a little😛